I am spitting angry 

I want to pull my hair

I want to scream 

No one was there for me

no one was there

And you know what

I did just fine

It is not your 


people need to empower 


I had to empower


No one was There 

for me 

I am spitting angry 

I am going to scream 

I am going to 

punch you in the face

I am just fine

But no one was ever 


for me 


Honesty isn’t Luxury

I have heard

that my body is 

my home

But I have never felt

so comfortable in either

I am trying to diminish until

Your finger marks have


I am trying to be 

strong enough to 

jump if I ever feel

like doing what they said I 

didn’t need to do

I am trying to be fast enough

to outrun the past

They said my body is the house

My home

and all I want to do is

burn it to the ground

Not so

You wanted to love me 

I could see it

But your hands were not made

for kindness and your muscles

Have an awful twitch and pull

Slam crash bang

You wanted to be better

But you weren’t better and 

No One Deserves

to wait for better when worst 

Is all that’s been shown 

You wanted wanted wanted

But you didn’t get it and 

I’m not sorry 

I’m not sorry 




Breaking in

You used to smile

I’ve seen it in pictures

My face never looks like

My face anymore

I can see my ribs now

I have lost every inch of me

That ever had anything

To do with you

I’m becoming nothing

Like you

You used to smile

I’ve seen it so

I’m going to sleep

I’m going to vomit

I’m not going to stop

I am working everyday

I have nightmares


25 MPH

I’m tired and cold

and the wind is too much 

I can’t stand up right

and people laugh at me

They are so cruel 

and I am so tired

I am so cold

I am Happy though

alive and breathing and 

I’m sick 

I am sick of being 

so far 

Of being too much 

Of being what I am 

I am happy though

I am okay 

I am breathing 

and I love you 

I am tired and cold

and the wind makes jokes

Makes me into a 


I Could Wait Forever

My words are shards

of glass

Have you ever had 

a splinter

I cannot stand taking

my splinters out 

I cry and scream and 

I am so terrified

That it will hurt

Not that the splinter doesn’t hurt

but I have in my 

Coping skills 

for that sort of thing

But the unknown

I have so many splinters in 

My soul 

I wonder if I’ll stop crying

long enough for you to 

Take them out

I wonder if you’ll 

stay through all my tears

And hold my splinters

in your hands

My words are shards

of glass 

Will you make me a 

stained glass window?

Will you stay?

No Words

You said the worst thing

you could do to a 

Trauma survivor is 

make it so they can’t talk 

about it 

But you don’t call on me in class

and my friends can’t handle my 

inane ramblings and my mom 

Is only ever concerned with people 


And I am so choked by the words

I’m not saying

that it’s a wonder I’m still 


Internal Ache

It is cold and 

I ache for things

you can do so easily

I have never had

a firm footing and you 

You go about like the world

was made for you 

And you go about like 

The world is yours and 

I have never own anything

I am sorry but I can’t

and you said it and I 

can’t anymore

It is cold and I ache

but not enough 


Not enough